


Shit Face gets Shitfaced

by Samanila_sandwich



Category: Broadchurch
Genre: Crying, Drunk!Hardy, Ellie's mom mode activates, F/M, Hardy is lonely, Hardy is sad, Hurt/Comfort, Sharing a Bed, Shit Face gets shitfaced, Suicidal Thoughts, Vomiting, season 3 spoilers??? maybe???
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-17
Updated: 2019-09-04
Packaged: 2020-07-08 11:36:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,834
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19868989
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Samanila_sandwich/pseuds/Samanila_sandwich
Summary: He slammed his glass down on the counter next to her, huffing and pressing his hands against the cool surface, staring at it for a moment.“I tried so damn hard.” He whispered, turning to Ellie with tears gleaming in his eyes. “Why wasn’t I enough?”Ellie could only stare, worry sizzling down to pity at the flip flop in moods. “Why weren’t you enough for what?”“For Tess! For Daisy!” He shouted, hands flying up above his head. “Why wasn’t I good enough for them! Was I a bad husband? Terrible Dad? Why did she have to cheat on me? Why...Why did she have to leave! Huh!? Wh-Why did they leave?”





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> What if after everything, Daisy ends up leaving after all, leaving Hardy to wallow in self destructive misery and Ellie to clean up after him?

Ellie pounded on the thick glass of the sliding door. “Hardy! Open up!”  
A few hours earlier he had ran out vaguely saying he had family matters to attend to and that he'd be back. When he didn't how back up though is when Ellie had started to get worried.

“Hardy! Open the bloody door! I want to make sure you’re-”

The curtain was pulled back to reveal a severely disheveled D.I with a bottle of whiskey in his hand. He tie was missing and his top three buttons were undone, his hair messier than usual and eyes bloodshot.

“Miller?” He spat, muffled through the glass. He yanked open the door and Ellie was hit with the stench of alcohol. “What’re ya doin’ here?”  
“Good god, are you drunk?” She questioned, following the D.I into his home. “You left work early so you could come get shit faced?”  
Hardy sneered at the term. “Why not? Everyone in the department calls me that anyways.” He countered before taking another swig.  
“What the hell happened?” Ellie demanded.  
“She left!” Hardy grinned with no mirth behind it.  
“Who?”  
“Daisy.” He chuckled. “She packed everything up and left. Said she didn’t want to live here anymore and wanted to move back in with her mum. Apparently they made up or some shite.” Another swig before he flopped back onto the couch. “So now I’m drinking away my loneliness!” 

Ellie gaped at him. “You’ve gone mad.”

Hardy blew a raspberry and flipped her off before tipping the bottle back once again and chugging.  
“Stop that!” Ellie snapped, taking the bottle from his hand and moving to the sink.  
“Hey!” Hardy whined, yet made no attempt to stop her.  
The D.S poured the bottle out into the sink then filled a nearby glass up with water from the tap.  
“Here. Drink.” She ordered, holding the glass out.  
Hardy scrunched up his nose childishly in annoyance. “I don’t want it.”  
“Drink it before I put your head under the bloody faucet!” Miller snapped, patience wearing thin.  
Hardy groaned exasperatedly before snatching it and drinking it anyways.  
They sat staring at each other, Ellie from her place leaned against the kitchen counter with her arms crossed watching her drunk boss sip water loudly like he was trying to make a point.

“Maybe I should kill mah-self.” Hardy slurred randomly into the lip of his glass. “Maybe jump off that cliff. Or blow my sodden brains out.”  
“Hardy!” Ellie gasped, horrified by the thought, picturing the gory aftermaths.

“I should!” He argued. “Who would even fuckin’ care! My wife left me. My daughter left me! Everyone in this damn town hates me!” He grit his teeth. “Shit Face!” He hissed, pushing to a stand and stumbling towards the woman. “Seriously! I can just hear them saying it when I’m not around. ‘Shit Face’. ‘Oi! You talk to Shit Face?’. ‘Oh damn, Shit Face is up my ass again.’” He mocked. “I don’t know why I fuckin’ bother, Miller!”

He slammed his glass down on the counter next to her, huffing and pressing his hands against the cool surface, staring at it for a moment.  
“I tried so damn hard.” He whispered, turning to Ellie with tears gleaming in his eyes. “Why wasn’t I enough?”

Ellie could only stare, worry sizzling down to pity at the flip flop in moods. “Why weren’t you enough for what?”  
“For Tess! For Daisy!” He shouted, hands flying up above his head. “Why wasn’t I good enough for them! Was I a bad husband? Terrible Dad? Why did she have to cheat on me? Why...Why did she have to leave! Huh!? Wh-Why did they leave?”

As he went on he started to pace, delving from shouting to crying, hiccupping between sentences. He stopped at the foot of the couch and flopped back to it, draping his arm across his eyes and continuing to cry, not drunk blubbering but rather true bone deep sobs that made Ellie sad with him.  
She took a breath and refilled Hardy’s glass before moving over to the couch.  
“Oi.” She called softly, tapping his shoulder. His sobbing softened to sniffles, the drunk man raising his arm to look up at the woman. “Sit up and drink.” She mumbled.

Hardy did as told, cooperative this time around, sitting up to give Ellie room to sit and taking the glass in both hands like a child. He sipped slowly, puffy eyes half lidded from exhaustion. Ellie made him finish the whole glass before standing and taking the glass back to the kitchen.

“Alright, sir. I think it’s time you went to bed.”  
Hardy’s eyes widened in what looked to be fear. “Are you leaving?”  
“No.” She sighed, taking off and hanging her coat. “I’m going to stay and make sure you don’t choke in your sleep.”

Hardy relaxed again at that, nodding to himself and standing. Ellie followed him to his room, stopping in the doorway. 

“Change and go brush your teeth.” She mothered, watching him brush but looking away and not looking back until he finished changing and slipped into bed.  
“Alright. I’ll be on the sofa if you need me.” She waved, turning to leave but stopping as a soft noise escaped the man in the bed.  
Hardy’s soft brown eyes watched her, illuminated by the light in the living room bleeding in through the doorway. He looked like he wanted to say something, tell her something, but didn’t. When his eyes finally closed, Ellie took that as her chance to slip back into the living room, snagging some spare blankets and a pillow from the linen closet and attempting to make herself comfy.

It seemed like she only had her eyes closed for a few minutes when she was woken up by a crash coming from Hardy’s room.

“Shit!” She heard him gag before the sounds of vomiting filled the small house. She got up and rushed over to the D.I’s room, finding him with his head in his toilet, emptying his stomach.

She sighed and knelt behind him, motherly instinct kicking in as she reached out and rubbed his back, a subconscious attempt to be comforting. When he seemed to be finished, she helped him stand and flushed for him, making the still tipsy man rinse his mouth and take off his vomit covered white tee.  
“Back to bed.” She shooed, tossing the shirt in the tub to be dealt with later and washing her hands before following him out.  
Hardy whined as he curled back up into bed, clutching a pillow to his chest.  
“That’s what you get for drinking’ so much.” Ellie chastised, moving to leave.  
“Miller.” Hardy called.  
“What?”  
“Can you stay here?” He muttered. “Just sit with me?”  
“Uh...sure.” She moved back towards the bed and sat stiffly on the other side against the headboard, looking awkwardly around his room, taking in what little knickknacks and decorations he had. A framed photo here, a few books there. 

Hardy mumbled something incoherent into his pillow, grabbing her attention.  
“I beg your pardon?” She questioned.  
“Do you hate me?” He repeated a smidge louder.  
“Wh-...Well...I was annoyed with you at first, yeah. And you can still be a dickhead at times.” She confessed. “But I wouldn’t say I hate you.”

Hardy nodded, staring off into space with his mouth buried in the pillow he was holding. He closed his eyes and was quiet for so long that Ellie though he might’ve gone to sleep again.

“You can lay down if you want.” He mumbled. “‘M not gonna do anything.”  
Ellie made a hesitant noise. “Best I didn’t.”  
Hardy nodded again, curling closer into himself.

Ellie turned her head and ran her eyes over him, really looked at him for once. Took in his messy hair and the heavy bags under his eyes. How thin he was and, despite his height, how small he looked at the moment, curled into himself like that.  
Even before the alcohol, he’d been a mess. And it wasn’t until now that she’d realized it.  
She snapped out of her trance as the man shifted closer, the top of his head nearly touching her thigh. It reminded her of Tom, when he used to curl up with her to watch telly on the couch when he was younger. Again, instinct took over and led her hand to rest on Hardy’s head, moving her fingers through his wild hair in an attempt to smooth it down.  
The man sighed deeply, all tension in his shoulders dropping as Ellie’s nails scraped over his scalp, the woman unable to stop herself from trying to comfort her boss, her friend.

“Miller.”  
“Hm?”  
“You…” He sniffled. “You can call me Alec, you know.” Still tipsy then.  
“I thought you didn’t like Alec?”  
“I don’t. Not when other people say it. But...I like how you say it.” Another sniff.  
“Alright. If that’s what you want.” She agreed, knowing the man would probably forget everything by morning. 

They both went quiet again for awhile, the room filled with only the sound of their combined breaths and rasp of Ellie's hand in her boss's hair.  
“Ellie.” Hardy whispered finally, not waiting for a reply. “Please don’t leave me too." He lifted a hand and rested it on her shin, playing with a loose string from her pant cuff. "Even if it is all patched up, I don't think my heart could take it if you left me too. You're all I got.”  
Ellie stopped her petting and sighed, bone tired. She could have ignored him, could have cast it off as the ramblings of a drunk man and told him to go to sleep, but she found herself responding anyways. 

“I won’t.” She whispered back.  


Hopeful brown eyes peered up at her. "Promise?"  
She nodded and brushed a lock of hair behind his ear. "Promise."


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The next morning after Hardy decides to get hammered and leaves Ellie as the adult for once.

When Ellie woke she was still leaning against the headboard of Hardy’s bed, her hand still buried in the tall man’s hair. Hardy’s head was in her lap, his arms wrapped around her legs and hugging them close to his still bare chest.

Her back ached but she didn’t want to move in case she woke the man before he was ready. He was already grumpy normally, so she wasn’t too keen on dealing with him hungover.

A sharp snore pulled her from her thoughts, jumping and staring at man curled halfway into her lap. She couldn’t see his face, left to imagine what the man looked like when he slept. Was his brow still furrowed? Did he still frown? Or did everything seem to melt away once he escaped consciousness? What she was sure of was that he snored, getting lost in staring at the rise and fall of his sharp shoulders with each breath.

When staring at her sleeping boss suddenly seemed too creepy she tried to close her eyes and go back to sleep.  
But without fail as soon as she was just on the edge of consciousness, Hardy groaned then made a choked noise and sprang out of bed, tripping over himself while making a beeline for the toilet again.

“Christ.” Ellie swore, chasing after him. She took up the same position from last night, kneeling behind him and rubbing his back, though this time he wasn’t wearing a shirt to act as a barrier between them in such an intimate act. 

He only managed to vomit whatever he hadn’t from last night, leaving him mostly dry heaving painfully. With his clean hand he reached behind himself blindly and grabbed Ellie’s hand. But instead of pushing it away like she expected, he just held it tightly; his own fingers clammy and trembling. 

When the episode passed, he let go and sat back on his haunches, head bowed and forehead resting on the lip of the toilet as he reached up without looking and flushed away his mess. 

“Brush your teeth. Clean yourself up. I’ll make some tea.” Ellie sighed, patting his shoulder and standing.

By the time Hardy came out of the bathroom, freshly showered but looking no less like death, Ellie was already sipping from a mug, watching him with a smile hidden behind the rim.

Hardy slumped onto the couch, pulling his knees up to his chest and burying his face between them.

“You alright there, sir?” Ellie called.

One hand came up with a single finger raised, making Ellie bark out a laugh in surprise. “Oi! That’s a rude gesture to give the person that wiped the vomit off your stupid face.”

Hardy’s head rose slowly with a look of horror on his face.

“I’m kidding.” Ellie chuckled, walking over with another mug of tea in hand, handing it over to the wincing man.  
“Thank you.” He muttered.  
“Yeah yeah.” She waved, dropping two painkillers into his hand as well.  
“No. I mean it.” Hardy argued. “Thank you, Miller.”  
Ellie waved him off again and took a swig from her own mug. “It’s fine. Was fun seeing you loosen up for a change. Spill your beans.” 

That was a lie. She hated it. Hated what she heard come out of her friend’s mouth. Hated seeing him so distressed and lonely, hated to think what might have happened if she hadn’t came to check on him. 

“What did I say?” He asked.

The woman shrugged in mock nonchalance. “Said you’d prefer if I called you Alec. That you liked the way I said it.”  
Hardy scoffed.  
“Talked about killing yourself.”  
That didn’t get any kind of reaction.

“Was that true?” Ellie pushed, brow raised expectantly.  
“No. You know I hate being called by my first name.”  
“You know what I mean!” Ellie snapped, worried by the man dodging her question.

He didn’t look at her. “I’d thought about it. Before.” He muttered. “After I failed the Sandbrook case. After the divorce. Just before I moved here. Thought about not taking my meds the next time an attack came.”  
“And?”  
“I was too much of a coward to go through with it.”  
“...And now?”  
“I...” He made an abortive noise and shook his head, “No. I’ll be fine.” He brushed his thumb over the side of his mug. “Daisy said she’d visit. Just didn’t want to live here anymore. Last night was just drunk me being...overdramatic.”  
“Then why’d you get drunk in the first place?”  
A shrug. “I was tired and lonely. Thought I’d deserved a drink. Got carried away.”

Ellie pursed her lips, staring at him hard.  
“What?” Hardy questioned, swiping a hand across his face. “Do I have something?”  
“You…” Ellie stumbled for words, bitter anger rising in the back of her throat like bile. “You have to promise me.”  
“Promise what?”  
“Promise me you’ll be okay. And if not, then that you’ll get help or talk to someone.”

Hardy set his mug down on the coffee table. “Miller-”  
“No!” She shouted, startling them both by the force of it. “I’m not going to go to work and not find you there. I can’t. It may be selfish but I’m not going to lose you too.” 

He sat up a little straighter, exhaustion shifting to surprise. 

“Last night you begged me not to leave. That I’m all you got.” Ellie pressed, voice tight and eyes stinging. “Well now I’m asking the same of you. I need you, Hardy. You’re my friend. Hell...Best friend even.”

Hardy stared at her the same way he had when she had invited him over for dinner. Before everything went to hell.  
“I...You don’t-” The man stumbled, voice soft and scared, scared of what exactly Ellie was unsure.  
“You don't need to say anything. Just promise me-” She croaked. “Promise me that you’ll talk to me if you need to. You’ll call me or come over next time you feel like drinking yourself to death.” 

Hardy nodded, eyes downcast. A range of emotions flickered over his face, stopping at thoughtful, eyebrows furrowing.  
He lifted a hand and awkwardly moved it to pat Ellie’s knee. “I promise.”

Ellie nodded and sniffed hard, rubbing at her eyes for a moment. Although awkward, she was touched that he tried to be comforting. She had always been touched that he tried. 

“Right.” 

Ellie was exhausted. Her back still ached and she felt gross still being in her clothes from the day before, but couldn't find the will or energy to stand and leave just yet. So instead with a heavy sigh, she let her head fall to thump against Hardy’s shoulder, making him jump. He said nothing of it, Ellie able to feel the shoulder under her ear relax some, his free hand reaching out to take his mug off the coffee table and sip at it again. 

Together the pair took in the cool silent morning, tea warm in their stomachs and burdens just a little lighter now that they aired their grievances and shared their load weight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope this doesn't disappoint yall

**Author's Note:**

> Should I leave it here or add what happens the next morning??


End file.
